i've made a promise

and my heart betrayed me...

p/s: stupid.

why can't i have both?

why can't feelings and rational come together?
why can't i have all in one?
i don't want to choose either one.. i want both!
choices are good but sometimes it's easier if we don't have any choice..
because normally choices have pro and cons..
and none of it is perfect..
and it's really hard to choose! sigh...

and why la why?? why can't i focus and think properly..
why i always fall for a jerk?
why can't i put aside all these and think just about my own future and life?
hati dan otak gile mengada skang.. rasa nak shut down je dua2!
(demm apesal tetibe emo plak ni? ish)

p/s: to a good friend who always give me great advise (i think you know who you are coz you are the only friend who always talk about my priority), i really appreciate it and i'm so lucky to have you as a friend now for i always failed to think properly myself. I hope one day you will be proud of me!

It's My Turn!

after all the hard works and the sleepless nights, I finally graduated from Multimedia University..
i will never forget all the experiences. The smile, the laugh, the tears..
I still can't believe that i am not a student anymore..

I can still remember clearly falling asleep on the "4x4" mahjung paper- crying and asking zaim to go and buy the ink for me coz I only have 1 hour to finish everything..
staring at the monitor the whole night and hoping that the idea can come faster..
looking at the watch and praying that hiro nakamura can come and freeze the time for me..
screaming and cursing the pc in the middle of the night..
asking the aunt to open the printing shop early coz we can't finish everything before 10pm..
make the mess with my fellow classmates in front of aunt's printing shop by using spraymount..
'ketuk-ketampi' for 8 hours and hoping that the umpa-lumpas can come and help us pasting everything on the mounting boards..

I can never forget Che Mat's face and voice when he screamed and asked me & Diyana to take the stairs instead of the lift..
I can still remember my legs are shaking and I can't say a word when I saw Mr.K entering the class during my presentation..
and the funny part when Qaha said "is the booth is the roof is the kuku kambing!" hahahahahahaha!

I can also remember clearly the classes with Ms Nana, Mr Nazri, Mdm Rina, Mr. Zul, Ms Tasha, Mr. Najib, Mr. Ramlan, Mr. Halim, Mr Edy, Puan Sri, Ms Mastura, Mr Imran, Dr Hew, Dr Neo Mai, Mr Ken Noe, Mr Ghaz, Mr Mus, Mr Norman, Mdm Forest, Mdm Koo, Mr Izani, Mr Kam, Mr Yap Sau Bin, Ms Linda, Mr Kannan..

Thank you so much to all the lecturers who never give up teaching us although sometimes we are just too 'bengap'.. huhu

to all my friends..Congratulations! we've made it!

can't believe we've been friends for almost 5 years already..


all my Partners in Crime!!!
From left:
Bona, JaQ, Gump, Nea, Qaha, Onana, Arm, Kecik

p/s: i will miss everything! sob sob~

Life is Great!

A wise person told me once, "if our life is screwed there must be someone that we can forgive.. By forgiving and forgetting the door to a greater life will be wide open.."

it's easy to tell others to forget the past, but can it really be done?
some people said, "i forgive you but i will never forget what you have done.."
what is that supposed to mean?

to me, i can never forget my experiences in the past, but i already forgot the feelings of it..
all that left are just stories.. tales..
something to share with my friends.. something to learn..
there's no anger, no hatred in those tales..
because it's already in the past.. once i forgive i will forget the feelings..

and now i feel great! my life is getting better and better..
i believe that God gives everyone more than second chance..
it's up to us to grab the opportunity and to change our own life..

every time we fall we learn something new..
all we have to do is just get up and continue the journey..

p/s: this world is so beautiful if we look closely..

Randomness

life seems pretty random these days..
my life is great and greater each day.. Alhamdulillah...
and lately i've been driving a lot..
i've been listening to x-fm and these songs have been repeated a thousand times..
i believe years from now, if i were to listen to these songs, it will definitely bring back all the memories.. *smile





p/s: i love my life!!!

Heart & Mind

sometimes my heart says something that doesn't rhyme with my mind..
and each time it makes me confuse..
every time things like this happen, i forced myself to choose..
and to tell the truth, it's the most difficult task to do!
because in the end, i still don't know whether my choice was right or wrong..

why my heart and my mind refused to cooperate with each other?
why am i in this situation?
why can't i lead a normal simple life like everyone else?
why is it so hard for me?

seriously, i'm tired.. i'm restless...
if i can just put aside my heart and my mind for one day, i'll definitely do it..
coz now it feels like i'm in the middle of a battle..
and i am fighting for both sides..
i am the hero for both servers..
and both of them are counting on me..

i have to be the judge in the courtroom..
my mind and my heart are the plaintiff and the defendant..
and both sides didn't give me enough facts and evidences..
so up until now, i still can't decide..
which one should win and which one should be punished..

p/s: confusion loves me so much and i can't get rid of it!

The Friday Surprise!

last Friday...

Diyana, Kak Nad, Syaza and I..
we went to ah hong for the yummy mantis..
later on we went to Changkat for a meeting..
And then went to Bestari for supper..
it was the weirdest night ever..
Coz later I've been told that everything was planed but the planed was suddenly changed..

At 6am we were supposed to be at home coz all of us were already so tired..
But suddenly Kak Nad asked me to drive to Putrajaya to enjoy the view..
It was weird but what the heck.. I just follow..

I was on the phone when we reached Putra..
So I don't really pay attention to what's going on..
Suddenly Kak Nad and Diyana came to me carrying a box..
A box with light in it..
It was a surprise!!!

Thank You Girls!!!

cute cupcakes!


Yumm yummy!

I love everyone..
including the one on the phone! :)

p/s: I am older and learning to be wiser.. thanks korang!!! xoxo